Sweet morbid and fairytale creatures,
I have the honor to share some parts of myself with you again.

This time I’d like to talk about a more superficial topic, my looks. People often tell me, that I have some unique look. I’m not sure if this is true, but I want to think about this with this blog post.


(Pic by Iseris)

My way of getting in touch with the goth subculture can be compared to what many others experienced. I always was some kind of weirdo, struggled with making friends, got bullied and didn’t know where I belong. But then there was that mysterious older friend, that I admired, always dressed in black. It was fascinating, so I started to find out what all this is about at the age of 14 or 15. After getting in touch with all the ideas, concepts and lovely music behind this look, I felt like this look is the one and only thing that is able to express that hidden aspects of my inner self, that this is the place where I belong.

Today I gather inspiration from many different sources that aren’t just goth related: drawings, movies, videogames, mangas, animes, foreign cultures, couture shows, music, nature, myths and of course also the work of other artists. Sometimes it even makes me sad, that there isn’t enough time left for learning more about sewing and working with different materials, ‘cause creating whole outfits consumes lots of time and money, that is already needed for making music and my everyday life.


(Pic by Lumina Obscura Photography)

At the end I tend mixing up all of what I saw. Sometimes I’m also not sure about whether I’m creating different characters or just being me in different clothes all the time. But I know that I like switching between two extremes: some kind of evil queen - cold and unapproachable - and the cute, lovely fairy. If others consider my looks as true goth or something like this, don’t bother me ‘cause I learned, that the most important thing is to be yourself all the time, 'cause this is the only thing that makes you feel satisfied.

Another aspect that might be causing a difference to many other looks could be my hair. I wanted silver-white hair since I was a child and I’m also a huge admirerer of dreads. Because I have really dark hair by myself, it would be impossible bleaching my hair white if I would wear dreads made out of my own hair, so I decided for synthetic dreads that I made on my own (by the way, I’d like to talk about all the aspects that come along with this hairstyle in another blog post, if you are interested).


(Pic by Annie Bertram)

There aren’t that many girls in the whole Alternative Scene that wear this kind of hairstyle. Furthermore I tend to combine this kind of style with looks that aren’t combined with dreads that often, like more doll-like or Victorian inspired looks. So maybe this is the reason, why people tend to say, that I look unique… weather this is true or not, I really appreciate the support and kind words of my fellow elves and fairys. I will do my best to express myself and my creativity every time and I will continuously try to set new aspects of my inner self alive.


By the way, the picture above this post was made by Starkall.